The Fixed and The Fuzzy

 All the signs point to good leaf peeking or peaking this week. Cool temps, warm afternoons and low chances of rain. 

These cats of ours have been so active, I guess due to the cooler temps. They found one of my eye shields and I discovered the noise coming from the entry way, Baxter and Buster seemed to be trying to tell the story of David and Goliath cause this eye shield has a elastic band on it. You know, like a pirate eye patch. Earlier I found make up brushes strewn about the bathroom floor. I just noticed a basket downstairs has mysteriously tumped over. These rambunctious ones really need to take another morning nap. 

Last Thursday on the way to the surgery center, the tire pressure light came on. It is that time of year to see that but how timely because the last time we saw that light was during Roy's trips to have his cataract surgery done in late 2024 and January 2025. Roy took the truck over to the tire center and they checked everything. All good with the tires but it could be a glitch in the computer system.

This past week has made me slow down a bit and really appreciate the gift of living here. We had officially closed on our home in October of 2014 and that was a good thing to celebrate this week. Between the fix and the fuzzy, I have been able to read without my eyes hurting. I got that stack of TBR books organized. Ok, who am I kidding, I got the several stacks of TBR books organized. Also, Roy got a couple of the metal rings moved for our garden next spring. We experimented with planting most of the tomatoes along the fence but that didn't work too well. So back to their original place and we made them into a compacted area for ease of watering in hopes of picking next summer. 

Looks like I am getting another year of the fallish view across the road. This summer a lot of prep work for building homes was happening. Roads and driveways staked out, drainage and what seemed to be the never ending of everyday construction and preparation noise. Then one day it stopped. All the rock hauled off, the big machines of progress left and here is the biggest sign, the port o potty was removed. For the first time in years it is a buyer's market in the housing sector. Must be cheaper to wait and postpone development than it is to have unsold homes with prices being reduced weekly built and ready to go. Some still have homes priced like it was during the last few years. Properties needing heavy and expensive remodeling are at a standstill. Thus this fall canvas  Shades of gold and green are so beautiful with the amber pasture in the foreground.

Is nothing sacred to our cats? I noticed a book had been knocked over before sitting down to do the eye drop thing. But the pink top drops were missing. I looked around trying to locate what I assumed had become a soccer ball for The Trio. Roy looked under a few tables and such, found it. Gee whiz, it's not like they don't have toys or things to occupy them. Now, I have to put the bottles in the little black bag that came with them. Ain't no thing really, but I thought I had put the bottles in an unnoticeable spot. Well, that was my first mistake. 

One of the first things I read the other morning was a well loved tribute to a well loved friend from a well loved and thankful friend. Her friend, best friend, had passed away this week. In those few sentences she honored the memory. I knew her friend but not very well. We all were in the same Sunday School class together for a few years. The stories I have heard and am now reading as friends share their memories, is she was overly generous and kind. That certainly came across to me those few years before she went to Tallowood Baptist. In contrast I couldn't help but think of the tennis friend who passed away a few weeks ago. Only the University of Houston posted a notice of her death. She was their first All American in tennis. Even the conciliatory expressions to her friend and long time tennis doubles partner, were carefully crafted in the way we say something thoughtful, but are saying nothing at all. I don't know if there will be an obituary or even a memorial service for her. 

The eye drops for my right eye began this morning. I am ready for these eyes to be balanced. I tried the lens pop out but my vision had gotten so bad the disparity really shows up and it is not helpful. When I saw the Dr on Friday, he as much as told me that would not work too well and the fact that the repaired eye is slowish on the side of healing. Ready to begin the next stage but you know...eye drops.  

Eyeing The Prize, One Eye At A Time

 Saturday October 17th, we can expect a rapid cool down that has already started but might end with a frost and or a freeze warning. These updates fluctuate rapidly, so much so I can't keep up with them. Roy picked the last of the bell peppers. His crop was very productive this year. Last year the tomatoes went bonkers. This year, meh. We are going to freeze many of them for pot roasts and such this coming winter. I have already ordered seeds for next year from Appalachian Seed Company. Beans, tomatoes and bell peppers. 

Left eye done. Cataract surgery that is. Having a thicker cornea and something else that I can't remember the name of will take a few extra days for clarity but I can see some improvement. Thursday night, I slept on the daybed in the front room that would enforce my flip flopping ban to sleep on my back, it was a fitful night of sleep. I woke up in the middle of the night and determined I was now blind in my left eye. As I dealt with that future the thought occurred to me that if I was blind in one eye, I might become a hymn writer like Fanny Crosby. She was blind and produced so many beloved hymns. Since my determination of blindness in the left eye, I figured I could be half as good hymn writer as Fanny. Now, to learn to read music. By Friday morning I knew I wasn't blind. It seems that I have experienced the opposite of what most people have after cataract surgery. Excluding the sun, nothing seemed brighter. Greens weren't popping and the sky was still that magnificent blue here in the Carolina's. But darkness was darker, deeper. Had the follow up appt with the Dr and I told him about the fitful night and he just smiled. Yep, one in about every five think that the first night. I also asked him if in the OR, he had said something to me about I might be seeing so many shades of orange as he did his work. He smiled and said, yes I did. Told him I almost said, as long as it isn't burnt orange of Texas, I'm okay with TN orange. Happy that I can sleep on my left side and I'm allowed to bend over to pick up stuff, but no heavy lifting. Wore my pirate like eye patch last night to sleep. Like it much better than one being taped on.  

***I need to add I am beginning to see that colors are deeper and vivid. I began noticing this yesterday afternoon. Maybe I am expecting things to happen sooner than later when I have been told I am on the later end of the deal.****

Random question, is the bent knee when posing in pictures the replacement of the hand on the hip that was all the photo rage a few years ago? 

Since the restrictions put on book reading and screen time, I have listened to stories of WWII and Amy Poehler's pod cast, Good Hang. At the same time I am re-reading a small Pat Conroy book that might have been published after he died. Title escapes me. Of course I looked at the book, can't remember the title but he was alive when it was published. 

This week a tennis friend from those days at The University Club passed away. In a relative term, she was young. I don't know any details but I did go down a rabbit hole this morning looking at obituaries of her family members. She and her husband were somewhat odd but then who of us aren't. Eccentric might be the word. Looks like her husband had passed away several years ago. There are people who didn't care for her but I felt like we got along. Being a bit awkward in that world maybe I made her feel better or that I had a teachable attitude in wanting to be better on the court. I got to remembering others that I met while playing tennis. A memorable experience by far. So many lively characters on the whole spectrum of life. One thing I discovered several months ago by going down one of these rabbit holes was this, a woman who bragged on her husband's accomplishments ALL THE TIME, really was bragging about a time in their lives long ago. He no longer did all the important work of a very important company and for an influential national figure but to hear her, he did, presently. It had come down to having a small office, no staff and maybe just a place for him to get away from home. So many years of keeping up a story that had been true but so long ago. I understand because when Roy was laid off, a whole bunch of tennis people dropped me as a friend. So thankful for those who didn't. 

 

Jaunts, Life and Such

 Years ago I took a vow to never, ever, never drive on a gravel road high up in the mountains. Yesterday, quite by accident I broke that vow nearby or in TN. I mean I even Googled it up, is any part of this scenic road gravel. Well, they lied didn't they. I think now I might be able to drive up to Cataloochee, but not going to try my luck or prayer coverage. I am getting ahead of myself, so let me begin at the start of this story. 

Our church group The Travelers planned a jaunt to Roan Mountain, TN for Texas Style BBQ. To this Texas transplant, that means brisket done right, which is the Texas way. This group of friends are always such fun. When we have had to miss the adventures we are truly saddened. Since it is autumn and the leaves are changing into those glorious shades , we decided to take the scenic route. I looked at the route on Google maps and it didn't look all that problematic and you see, that proved to be a problem because in reality all mountain roads have certain and yet problematic issues. Narrow roads turned even narrower. The number of Independent Free Will Baptist Churches increased along the road. This should have been a sign unto me and just as we started up the mountain, the paved, needs maintenance road became a gravel road. It is stressful driving that's for sure and the GPS kept working and we knew how many more miles unto civilization. Roy enjoyed the scenery and from time to time say something like, "look at those colors! No don't look." In everything give thanks, so I was thankful we didn't have any oncoming traffic and we saw signs of civilization when we saw Amazon delivering. We finally made our way off that mountain into Roan Mountain. Actually, it has been a sometime but things in Roan Mountain State Park looked familiar from those long ago jaunts with Houston friends. The very real surprise awaited us. We pulled into Holy Smokes, Texas BBQ looking for a building but what we found was a shed type building with a cover over the picnic tables. There was a line for BBQ but this mountain driver needed to use the facilities, not a tree over yonder. Roy had noticed another BBQ place just down the road and we went there to check it out and use the facilities. Roy told the counter girl we were meeting friends and if she would give him some menus he could almost guarantee we would be back for lunch. Back to Holy Smokes and we waited just a few minutes. Our friends pulled up and the shocked faces probably mirrored ours from a few minutes before. Long story short we went to the other BBQ joint and had a delicious lunch and of course we had to tease our fearless leader, Connie. We kept laughing and joking and her new standard response due to the circumstances, "but, we had fun!" We did, that is true! We decided that if she recommends a BBQ restaurant in the future, we will audit her choice, maybe form a committee and do our due diligence. After lunch we headed over to Erwin while others took the opportunity to peruse garden shops and thrift stores. Roy and I punted Walmart and just went to Food City. Then stopped in Mars Hill for a quick trip into Ingles for rotisserie chicken. 

*****

Well, we are on countdown week, finally. If it seems much ado about nothing I try to be in the best condition when approaching procedures, surgery and the like. Since heavy lifting is prohibited afterwards, I have been changing out seasonal clothing, getting boxes ready for Goodwill and moving things around. I also erred on the side of caution because I woke up with a sore throat Sunday morning. It is not like getting a cold sore throat but one that signals, "this is a sign unto me." Slow down, take it easy and stay in those parameters. We didn't go to church Sunday morning cause it felt like I would be pushing it for this upcoming week. 

Once again a hurricane tropical storm affected the mountains of North Carolina. We had rain almost all day Saturday sometimes a heavy rain and we did have some windy conditions but all in all our area was not impacted significantly. Now other places, yep, flash floods, mudslides and loss of power. 

I don't know if it is like nesting that soon to be moms get, but I have been on a roll getting projects done around here in the past few days. Nothing earth shattering but a little more organization and such. We got a lot taken care of this week. I figure when I can see really well, I might be upset about dust and such. Once again the dinning room table is clutter free and hopefully remain that way for at least a couple of days. I am still working on the kitchen table. It is the most difficult to keep clutter free. 

Got the news yesterday that a friend from church in Houston passed away. Such a sweet soul. She worked with Roy at EPD for a couple of years until their careers there took them in different aspects of that pipeline company. She and Darlene came to Asheville one Thanksgiving and we got to spend a day together having fun and loving these mountains. Such a sweet time. She is with Jesus and all her loved ones that got there before her. 

Roy and I were talking last night about how far I have come health-wise since just a few years ago. I am not fully there yet, but pretty dang near it. It was a lot, side effects from the Co8!d vaccine, a huge bit of unexpected grief, health issues that have baffled and all that stuff. I felt somewhat of a breakthrough with the PA at the cardiologist office listening to me and the first step to solving some of those health things. Roy and I agree that I still depend on him so much and he is joyful in his responses helping me. Well, maybe if I make a smart aleck remark, his first response is not so uplifting. Ha! We have gone through these years upbeat, not maudlin, optimistic and trusting the Lord.  Those adjectives are the fruit of trusting God.  

Autumn and Catching The Smartest Cat In The World

 Well, we are in the first day of October. Not exactly consistently cool yet but cool mornings are welcomed...not the fog so much but it will burn off soon enough. We are crossing the to dos off the list in anticipation of cataract surgery for me later this month. So, earlier than usual I am exchanging fall/winter for summer clothes. Roy has scheduled all the appointments for here at the house to be ready for winter. It could be a cold and wet or snowy winter but we shall see. 

I came across a picture of someone from the very long ago when we first started attending First Baptist Houston. We were in Sunday School together. She was very put together clothes wise and it seems she did some modeling. Many Sundays she wore a hat, angled just so slightly where her eyes remained hidden. Dang, she had her act together back them and of course I was and still can be an early embracer of the disheveled look. Back then I had no other choice, so I went with it. Now, it's a choice, but I digress. One Sunday morning, in class, I popped my head under her hat cause I was curious to what she might be hiding. I don't know if I was bored or what but the whole class cracked up. Soon enough the beautiful lady and her handsome husband left our fair church for greater unknowns. Only, I don't know what they found or that huge success they had dreamed of in church world. No one that I hung around with kept up with them, but soon enough on FB, she popped up this year. Wow! That fine bone structure and angles had morphed into a kindly grandmother look. Didn't notice a hat in any recent pics but she retired as a school teacher. There is nothing bad about morphing into a grandmother look, but she is one of those who I felt would beat it. I mean you can hold back time somewhat, but the skincare regimen is costly and so very time consuming. The adage of only taking fifteen minutes a day has never enticed me, cause it is the fifteen minutes of the day when I am wanting to go to sleep. 

This person appeared as if on cue on FB while reading Kristin Du Mez's latest book, Live, Laugh, Love. It goes deeply into everything and every thing I wouldn't have thought would be connected. Starting with a book published in the late 1800's, which I read but not in the 1800's but in the 1970's, and it sets the tone. While being limited to book reading and screen time until cataract surgery, I would have consumed this book faster than I did. Wow! I told Roy after reading it, all the things I rejected as fluff or gratuitous wasn't my rebellion but could it be, would it be, discernment? Being a few of the fortunate ones, I had the opportunity to make fun of all this junk doing Mildred and Gertrude performances. Most of all the laughs were based on true stories in the church and we tried to disguise them enough so no one recognized themselves. But the fact that Amway, Precious Moments, and most MLM products are part of the history that shaped many. I don't know how many offers I turned down of some exciting investments or business opportunities on my own and I dictated the time, and I don't remember in the book that if The Prayer of Jaybez is mentioned but dang, that was one big ol marketing opportunity for Lifeway or whomever manufactured the fury of claiming territory. 

For years I have said it is the women who carry the water buckets for this hyper energized atmosphere of men in leadership, the women are more dangerous than the guys pushing the dogma. Their worth and dare I say influence, no it is probably more like their power comes from toting those pails and enforcing "rules" with a vengeance that could put most of these hyper energized male leaders to shame. If the woman is from the south, there is even more danger in how things are done in a super southern/spiritual way that can do such gracious and lasting damage. ***note*** We are in John 4 in church. Our pastor is jubilant to preach the gospel and it shows. I love it! Anyway, the woman at the well...she is getting water and he pointed out how heavy those water jars were empty as well as full. Those biblical women doing the water procurement must have been very strong and had muscles, while never even stepping into a gym. I kind of laughed to myself knowing what I had written on the blog. I also had this thought, I wonder if the disciples ever got upset they were sometimes about the business of getting food. Did Judas think I didn't sigh up for this "kitchen duty" because I am looking for this job to advance my resume when Jesus takes down Rome. Of course, the ministry of Jesus held much more and great lessons of serving. This little rabbit hole has opened up a few tabs on the computer. I will get back to reading those later. 

One water bucket carrier that remains in memory from those long ago days when new ideas on worship were all the rage had this brilliant idea that our church could use that time honored Baptist tradition of liturgical dancing, with long ribbons on a stick. Guess kind of like rhymical gymnastics. As I listened to the talk, that was really a small circle of her friends and when she realized that Peggy and I were standing there as well, she tried to make the circle even smaller. She explained there was a school that would teach the liturgical moves with the sticks and ribbon. We asked questions and as the circle kept growing tighter in, she explained that these were very intricate moves. Not just anyone could pick up a stick with a long ribbon on it and praise the Lord. Peggy said, there's a school? A class? Nancy and I are the two most athletic women standing here and you don't think we could twirl a ribbon on a stick? I don't think the ribbon dancing went anywhere cause I never saw it used in worship, unless it was a Christmas program. If memory serves, I think the stick dancing went the way of all weird ideas, to the heap of disappointments. 

October still holds some cooler temps and some warm temps. Ready for fall and those coming days. Things are moving along for cataract surgery. Got the eye drops and all the instructions. We had Circle Joy Monday and as always, God is so present in those meetings. I love them, the meetings and the sisters in Christ. 

We are feeling accomplished because we got the smartest cat in the world to the vet. It took two weeks of planning, feeding the orange boys in their sleeping quarters, and trying to rehearse getting the cat carrier into the house without a sound of warning. Buster is home and acting friendly, but Willie who we weren't even trying to catch has hold up in his hidey place. I'm holding lunch for he and Mr Mo. 

The Shortest Time of The Year

 Day one of official capturing of the other five cats concluded with two caught and one war wound suffered by Roy is the attempted capture of Buster. Good thing Roy had on jeans, isn't on a blood thinner and his determination is still strong to get the others in. He is also current on all his shots. So far, only Mr Mo has come over to me, the rest are hiding or laying low. We shut all the doors upstairs so they couldn't blend in under the bed. I believe all the family later this afternoon will have good naps. 

Later in the evening I realized I had suffered a claw injury. Buster got his back feet against me as I tried to hold on but alas all I have his little puncture wounds that could be used like that children's game, connect the dots. Thus the red little dots showing up on my tshirt. Roy was able to get everyone to go to bed at the usual times. We gave Chubola her meds a little early and then I took my book and ice tea to the room to sit with her. Of all the unexpected things she ate a little, not unexpected and then sat next to me asking for pets. She moved onto my lap. I was so happy cause this is another breakthrough with her. She even moved toward the brush letting me know she was interested. So, we sat there while I brushed her.

Day two of catch those cats in some ways, easier and in other ways harder than day one. No surprise element. Roy got Willie into a bathroom and it sounded like world war III was happening. Roy came out the victor with Willie caught. So Mr Mo and Willie went to the vet. Now only Buster is left and he has an appointment on Monday. We welcome the two days of rest. All these kitties are watching us with side eyes and soon enough that will watching will become a distant memory until this time next year. Oh my. 

We had to miss going with friends for lunch at The Pisgah Inn. Several said how cool it was but a little hazy. That's okay sometimes the haze makes for more interesting pictures. 

*****

We never got Buster to the vet office. We have an appointment in a couple of weeks and we have a new plan but we wanted some time to get him off alert each time we enter a room. This morning even though Baxter got his visit with the vet and the vaccination against this cold stuff, he is sneezing just a bit. Keeping an eye on him. I am in the process of getting all the bed clothes washed from the front room which served as Chubola's quarantine room.  I think I will also use the time to get things ready for recovery after cataract surgery. Having a clear area to get Chubola from underneath the daybed caused me to finally organize books and notebooks. As they say the ADHD brain needs a deadline or an emergency to get things taken care of. I have a ways to go being openly more organized but it is always good to make a start. I am so ready for all these little kitties to feel better and return to their life of ease and food on demand. Wait! That didn't change, oh well. 

Our Monday morning began early, well mornings always are early but you know this Monday was having to get out and about in the world. Roy's truck had a service appointment for new back brakes, oil change, all the filters changed, tires rotated and balanced and yearly inspection. Wow, that bill was a few dollars cheaper than the emergency vet bill. I picked Roy up from the shop and we headed toward Weaverville for a few errands. Got all that done and returned home. Then the exhausting Buster hunt and then that about did me in for the rest of the day. The fog yesterday morning was so thick and really never let up anyplace along the routes. This morning we have rain. 

I finished our book club book and I loved it! The story well told based on historical Asheville/Madison County/Buncombe County history. Because of the need to avoid eye strain, I read it in small segments because normally I would have devoured this several weeks ago. 

The first morning of fall is not disappointing. Feels like a corner weather wise has turned. Must resist wearing everything fallish today...boots are calling, no rain is falling...summer retreating...the shortest time of the year has started. 

Job 6:6-7 Life Lessons From the Word That Will Change Your Life

 On Monday in the waiting room of the Smash and Grab, mammogram, I found myself in an interesting conversation with a young woman who accompanied her grandmother. The young woman wearing the contemporary of the day and I in my usual jeans, tshirt and tennis shoes. In that brief moment we talked for a just a minute but she asked if were jeans my usual choice. Yep, if I can, I do. I think it is because of what I came into clothes styles in the 70's. The dressier code was on the way out and I embraced casual for many reasons but mainly it was the cheaper version of looking presentable. The young woman lamented she couldn't get her grandmother to wear jeans and my response, what's her age? She was about 8 or 9 years older than me and part of the I wear jeans as a last resort generation. Well, some of that last resort generation. About that time my name was called to go behind the golden door. I still have trouble with those hospital gowns they give you at all doctor offices. I never get those ties correctly together. By the time I got home from the smash and grab, Hobby Lobby and Marshall's, the results were waiting for me in my inbox. All is well, all is clear, but I did learn as long as you are mobile you don't age out of the mammos. 

This morning the view from the rear window was spectacular as usual. The view has always been there but in the last couple of years moving to the other side of the room helped me discover the arching trees framing the view especially when our neighbors horses are in the lower pasture. Of course in the late summer the fog contributes that reminder of looking through a glass darkly. The forecast is for another hot one but soon the feel and look of fall will be upon us. 

*****

And now we are well into a ber month with times moving quickly, more to attend to than I am really wanting to do but I have to and the like. So this morning instead of going with this line of thought I decided I would bring back a blog post from September 13, 2009. Oh there are many things and thoughts that have fallen by the wayside but I do remember the particular Sunday I wrote about. 

Job Was Sick So Long, Till the Flesh Fell Off His Bones 2009

In Sunday School today as the teacher was referring to different verses, she knew them by memory and you could tell that knowing them so blessed and ministered to her but I never opened my Bible to look at those verses she referred to and I am such a visual person. Peggy and I concluded that memorizing scripture, tons and tons of it, should probably not be talked about to others, so a natural overflow happens. The Word ministers and you're not standing there thinking, oh this must be part of the 1000 verses he/she are trying to memorize this year.


OK, so I did use some of the announcement time in Sunday School, since it went on much longer than usual, to try and find a verse in Job that I had seen this week. Job is a funny book and I think I have more trouble reading it, more than the book of Revelation. It's like, you shouldn't read anything that the three friends said to Job since God chastises them at the end for what they said. So, I find myself just reading Job's replies and then what God says. Anyone else think these kind of thoughts?

Anyway, I found the verses I was looking for. These verses would have been great to know and have memorized as a kid for not cleaning my plate. I tried to share this verse with Carole Lewis, National Director for First Place for Health, this morning. I think it would be a great verse to know in First Place. But, I am going to memorize these verses for such a time as needed. You know those times, table talk, small group sharing, and the like, especially when you aren't sitting with friends or people who should know better than always believe what your sharing.

Is tasteless food eaten without salt or is there flavor in the white of an egg? I refuse to touch it; such food makes me ill. Job 6:6-7

Wouldn't it be fun just to answer some deep, deep theology question with verse 6?

Learned Person: So I believe that Calvin would back me up on this and of course we are all familiar with what happened on the plain of Dura.

Me: ah yes, of course. It is written, is tasteless food eaten without salt or is there flavor in the white of an egg? Why do the birds go on singing, why do these eyes of mine cry? Don't they know it's the end of the world and it ended when you said goodbye.

Learned Person: oh yes of course because deep calls to deep at the sound of Thy water falls and we should not forget His benefits.

Me: I wake up in the morning and I wonder why everything's not the same as it was. No I can't understand, no I can't understand why life goes on the way it does. I refuse to touch it; such food makes me ill.


Only in my imagination, that is running away with me, would any of this happen. But hey, we need to dream and have BHAG type of goals.

Since there are all kinds of lyrical references in this post, I cannot sign off without leaving you with this. I have written that I end my workout with the song, I'm Not Tired Yet. Well, the second to last song I listen to is this

Job was sick so long till the flesh fell off his bones. You know his wife, cattle and his children, everything he had was gone. But Job in his despair, he knew that God still cares and He may not come when you want Him, but He's right on time, right on time.


You can't hurry God. No, you just have to wait. No you can't hurry God, you just have to wait. Oh oh, you can't hurry God, you just have to wait. He may not come when you want Him, but He's right on time, right on time.

Actually, the song is wrong. He still had his wife, she said curse God and die. Job responded very piously and thoughtfully to her, is tasteless food eaten without salt, or is there flavor in the white of an egg?

 

Of Life Onto Fall

 Ah yes, the bionic life is coming closer and closer. Now to go with my advanced hearing due to hearing devices...new description of hearing aids, I too will join the cataract surgery club in October. Believe me, I need all the extra help and in thinking about the circle system of resolving one health issue, two more will show up, I think this might work in reverse as well. Hoping this eye tweak will help with balance. I know I became less confident with walking and steps when I had to wear glasses full time. Hmm...perfect timing with autumn on the horizon and a mountain coaster I've wanted to ride. The eye exam yesterday made my spidey senses on alert. It wasn't too much of, well it's your decision to or not to, but this year that was made minute and the emphasis on you need to take care of this...sooner than later. The doctor is going on a three week vacation in September so remembering bilateral knee replacement during Thanksgiving holidays I chose after he returns home. If I needed any other proof that I need this surgery, I just looked at the Anthropology site on my phone and thought I saw a nativity set but when I clicked on it, dogs with place card holders. Gee...

This morning I read a short essay by one of my favorite authors. Thought provoking as she ponders, well more than ponders the effect of abuse, violence and neglect in her family line. She just put it out there but knowing her from her readings, there is something to come of this and dare say in the genre of victory. Her writings are not filled with bubbly affirmations nor does it seem to be thoughts that will become a two part book deal. And I might add not selling product she has found useful in farm life. She has had great mentors and she in turn has been a great mentor to young women both as a mom and spiritually as a believer. Very level headed. As she shared the facts and then the "I wonder ifs."  I began to think about our family's linage and the "what ifs" and the "I wonders." The only time I can remember really feeling empathy for my father was when my grandmother, his mom, accused him of stealing money from them and it also gave her the chance to tell him every grievance and fault she had with him in front of family. My grandparents had $10,000 hidden all around their house but really just in shoe boxes. He had put that money in a CD for them but she didn't understand that. I believe we were on the cusp of her dementia. That is also when we found the dishes from last Thanksgiving in the dishwasher. These were from last Thanksgiving. He might have been different but he had a HUGE mother wound that he could never get over. Even in death his father was crying out for my father's brother when only my father was there. Now I am thinking that and I wonder, did he make that up cause I have heard other stories. All the agencies and others he bedazzled with adroit lies had to admit that he was the best liar they had ever encountered. Ironic, that in the FB memories from 2014, when my father demanded me to come pick up eight boxes now or they were going to Goodwill. Well, I was in NC for a month, looking for a house to buy and how in the world did he come to demand those boxes being picked up? Cause the one who betrays told him and dense headed me didn't realize the role that one who betrays was playing. Friends volunteered, delivery services recommended but alas I received the boxes in September curried by his friend, who still thought I was guilty of all he accused us of. Yea, it didn't look suspicious, a black woman with boxes in back of her Jag and I, a white girl in a Sequoia loading them in the back of the car at a nearly shuttered in mall. Funny, we saw several others doing the same thing. 

For such a hot and humid summer, the summer passed quickly. We are making that slow turn into autumn and then I will be able to use one of the all time favorite descriptions, autumnal. Different stores in the area are making this weekend their fall debut. Our ornamental cherry trees have been losing leaves but that is due to a fungal attack. We googled up the plan of prevention and will begin that operation once the temps drop which starts off tomorrow. 

*****

It's been a few days since last writing. For the meanwhile I have to restrict screen and reading time due to some eye issues, mixed with some bloodwork issues which has been delegated to; it could be something or it could be nothing. So, this is standard practice it seems, if I stay within my parameters things go better. My prayer is for the it could be nothing aspect. I could go audio books but dang, if my attention span is almost nonexistent. 

We are just days away from ber months and I am so excited. Hopefully, the temps will respect the ber.