It is late afternoon early evening...much later than usual for me to write. Although, I did write my post of second that emotion later yesterday. Rereading that post I see I am all over the place but that is what happens when emotions are whacked out. I thought writing about them would help release the hold or rather grip they have had on me and somewhat it did help. Many times people who are humorous or jovial give the impression that at times life isn't difficult. Well, for all of us, at times, life can be hard which is a little beyond difficult. Thankfully, I have a husband that can talk me off the emotional edge and speak truth. Last night he had to do double duty to calm my fears and doubts.
So, there I was happily spraying Round Up on vegetation when our neighbor rides down to her gravel road above our backyard and asks me why we cut down her trees. Oh my goodness...she had stood on that same gravel road and told the tree guy, Roy and me we could do whatever we needed to do, she didn't want to have to pay. She wasn't ugly, but she was terse. We talked through everything and I refused to join in on the level of our conversation cause that only helps to escalate it. I reassured her, we were going to take care of the wood chips and that we planned to plant trees, on her part in the spring and we would want her input on the trees and yes, we would water them. Then the conversation turned into a few fear tactics and the like. Really, the trees we had cut down were partially our trees and would totally damage our home if they blew over in a storm. Most of what we had done was clearing out the underbrush and vegetation. They weren't going to do that. She did make a funny saying it was a good thing she wasn't the Floridiot and that is very true. Roy is going to go talk with her. Funny, when I told her that we were having the front cleared out she was all for that...I didn't remind her that she had told us there on that same gravel road that they would clear out the front because they had all the equipment to do that. Like I said it was a civil conversation but it was not the thing I needed to be added to the emotional turmoil I was experiencing. I came in and talked with Roy about that and how I just felt like I was imploding. Thankfully, he didn't try to do the manly thing and try to solve everything for me. He made me laugh with a there there. There, there, which is our funny of being compassionate. He let me talk through all my struggles and fears, both real and imagined. He made me laugh. He's good people. I love him! Think I will keep him!
I went to bed much later than usual because I wanted to finish this great book, The New Neighbor. No, it is not something I wrote...but I wanted to see how everything resolved. It was worth the late night finish which kind of knocked Buddy off her regular track. She was restless but not like usual and I actually got some sleep.
Today, Vivian and I went to lunch at Stony Knob. The food is delicious and I love the atmosphere. We had a great lunch, ran a Mary Kay errand and then we took off to Marshall. (City in Madison County, not the store) Yes! The store was open that I had driven by on Saturday. Lots of weird stuff in the store and it was interesting. Vivian didn't go in because of the dust and probably mold with all the old things in the old building. She was right to stay in the car. We took the scenic road back home...they are all scenic, but one I had not traveled on before. When I got home, I started doing all the last minute cleaning that needed to be done. I have a few more things to do. Last night I decorated the dining room with some fall type things. We didn't move any of the fall decorations from Houston up here. I tried not to go wild in Home Goods but it was difficult because they kept putting out fall decor. I even went into Jo-Ann's to look a bit and found a couple of thing to add the the fallish cornucopia of decorating, although I am not doing a cornucopia.
Something so encouraging happened this afternoon. I thought the Muhlenberg book would be at the Post Office but it wasn't. Something more wonderful was there, a card. A card from one of the ladies in my SS class. Her words were so encouraging to this soul who is needing a cool refreshing drink of water. The Lord used her card to confirm that why I am here and what I do is meaningful. It is helpful and along for free comes the laughs. I am so touched by her words and will treasure this card. I believe that this is the start of the healing process emotionally.
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