I am married to an overachiever and he is married to a...well, I'm not an underachiever nor am I just an achiever...guess I am more selectively achiever. Maybe I am a flow with the tide kind of person, but there are interruptions in that mindset where I care way too much or apathy sets in. Like doing the outdoors work, motivated, made do and got a little creative with it all but then July and August set in. Too hot to work like I had and especially toward the end of August, the annuals are beginning to fade out, so watering isn't even an interest. I was reading an article this morning concerning overachievers and how and if they are dealing with these past months of social distancing and shutting down. The term the author used is surge capacity. It is depleted and that is why we can feel awful. The article is written by Tara Haelle. I haven't totally digested the article so I'll save comment for later but it did interest me in the differences between Roy and me and how these months have affected our mindset and emotions. He takes on big projects whereas I seem to divide up things into much smaller portions, think that is the go with the flow part of me. I see little things around the house that once I take care of, it feels like a huge accomplishment but Roy not seeing these little things nor knowing how I solved the problems just looks at me like I could have done more. Yep, sure could have if I was an overachiever. This probably explains why during these months my attention span is shorter than usual. Friends send me videos or songs and I don't look at them or listen, not because I'm not interested, it's just I am in for two seconds and my attention is elsewhere. If someone sends me an article I read it, more able to focus on words that thoughts. I do know everyone seems angrier than usual and what we have chosen to be angry over covers a broad range. This is not a paragraph on politics, it just seems like a lot of us are at our wits end. My petty anger happens in the grocery store with one way aisles...and in those one way aisles people leaving their baskets in the middle blocking everyone and the free flow of cart traffic both legally and illegally. We are trying to six feet it but if one is not aware of the blocking and doesn't respond to excuse me, we are all breathing in, less than six foot, air through our masks. Just pick up a can of corn and be done with it. See, even writing about this has caused a little spark to get me upset. The ol' surge capacity is depleted. So, how do I refill it?
Feels like a new paragraph needs to start, refilling? Well, the article suggests being kind to yourself especially if you are an overachiever. That takes all different shapes and forms, like forgiving yourself for not being as productive...giving yourself more time to finish projects...and extending that grace to others. Hmm... it looks like I am already kind to myself. Truthfully, I am baffled by overachievers and perfectionists. I would be in a world of hurt if those traits were a part of my DNA. While drinking coffee and perusing FB and Twitter, a blog post that I have newly followed was so timely. The author wrote about kindness and how we can extend a little bit of kindness that can make a world of difference. She gave examples of real life, little things, words and actions of kindness she has never forgotten from her life. At the end she simply wrote a few words about extending those kindnesses in today's world of fear, Covid, and anger. You can read her post on FB, Jess Johnston Wonderoak. This reminds me that August in 2014 when I got to spend a month here, I called it God's Kindness. I was so aware of His kindness during those restful, productive and relaxing days. Productive cause on the day we left to return to Houston, we had bought a house.
This morning I extended kindness to this rowdy bunch of ferals in the back. Let them hang out in the garage after a night filled with rain. They love indoor plumbing and wait in line to use the box. I did have to get after Radley cause he had climbed up to the gutter spout on the back porch and was looking into the security camera. Never had one do that. Over the past three years there has been ample opportunity to watch these mother cats teach their kittens. Each mom has a different style even with their different litters. Punky is a patient mom and attentive, Mama Cat not so much but she does teach them.
A bit of happy news in the midst of everything, I ordered and wore a smaller size of jeans, and the jeans were on sale. All good all the way around. The chuck steak I cooked in the crock pot was good but chuck roast is better. The one pot broth though is a winner and will be on the repeat cycle. I started a new book last night and can tell it is going to be good but it is too much like what I have been reading, so back on the shelf for now and today I will peruse the TBR pile downstairs.
Before Roy arrived in August, he had his twice yearly check up and while here the Dr office wanted him to come in for a follow up appointment. They were concerned with bloodwork but wouldn't be specific. Roy went to the follow up appointment and came out of there pretty steamed, no make that mad. While his bloodwork has concerns it was the approach the Dr chose to take which pretty much was, throw him to the side, prescribe some meds and see him in three months. Roy turned down his first option of meds and went with the second choice. It just so happened that while Roy was here, he worked on a humorous speech for Toastmasters. In it, he mentioned the Dr who saved my life in 2008, details that wasn't the humorous part, and we decided to see if she was back practicing medicine. She had been with a large hospital but it was not a good fit. She was back and in the Med Center. When Roy was telling me about his appointment I mentioned that he should call her office and get an appointment. He did, she is a concierge dr now and I told him he was worth the fee. Her attention to detail is refreshing in the medical field. Since then he has had an appointment with her, and follow up appointments with others in the practice and with Baylor. He is on the right road, with a plan and that's good cause Roy is a plan man and overachiever. Which brings us back to the first paragraph...overachievers.
Well, with my short attention span, I have moved furniture in between writing these paragraphs. I don't rightly know where I was going with the point above, so let's just let it be for now. Once again showing no overachiever here, well in this particular bent. I am practicing kindness because when one moves furniture and stuff, you have to find places for the stuff or give it away. Probably going to be a little of both.
Our Beta rain must be moving out because the skies are beginning to clear.
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