The foggiest of foggy days is happening in our area. When you glance out the window upon first waking up and all you see if fog, dense fog...you know it will hang around a little longer than most early morning fog. I like watching the familiar trees, houses and scenes reappear slowly but surely in such a haze. We can hear the birds, we just can't see them.
Our long time pastor of Houston's First Baptist Church, Brother John's wife passed away this week. The outpouring of memories on FB to the family are heart-felt and deep. Oh and numerous... The memories almost down to each one remembers her laugh and how she could light up a room upon entering it. So many have shared their recent Celebration memory. The end scene of Jesus resurrected and welcoming all those dressed in white...as they come running to him. And so many wrote about the expression on Uldine's face as she truly lived out her part as she had in life, running to Him in full worship. My path didn't cross hers many times during the years but she did ask Peggy and I to be a part of an evening extra skit for a church women's retreat. I think that is where our parody of Love Lifted Me came from...I don't remember but I do remember we had fun. So many times we read or hear people use very measured words for one who has just passed away. Trying to say something nice or trying to overlook a quirk that got on everyone's nerves but not so with Uldine. The feelings of people expressed are just the truth and not the truth as they are trying to convey. She touched so many lives with kindness.
I know this will make everyone jealous, but I went to the dump yesterday with several flattened cardboard boxes and two bags of filler from said boxes. This year I have tried to cut back on my ordering thus cutting back on the disposal of cardboard in an ecological way. But there was a few weeks when the sales were too good especially things for the home that just couldn't be resisted.
This morning I read the last in a series of blog articles on the different seasons women find themselves in. This has been a good read because the seasons named weren't the usual ones we see in this kind of series and each of the women, both young and not so young, gave great contemplation to the subject they were given. Today's post on stewarding what God has given you in this season, was exceptional. It didn't go the predictable path. Now is there is something that gets my admiration, when one chooses not to do the predictable thing. I have spent a majority of life trying not to walk the predictable. Although, there are many things predictable about me. We all have that but mainly when others are trying to put us in a box, so that they can understand or manipulate their interactions with us...the size of the box has to change, cause I'm not going in the one you've prepared. These past few months as I have wrangled with a few emotions and thoughts and plans, I have realized the first five years of life and the last five years are the seasons that I experienced the least amount of being manipulated and fighting so hard against it. Now it has brought about a hyper sense of that when it feels like someone or something is trying to extract a response that is not organic or generated out of my free will. The fear of being dominated and cajoled into an image that is not me is absolutely terrifying. Thus one of the constant themes of this life, don't fence me in, don't try to make me into something I'm not and don't try to define me by a box. It is funny that throughout the weeks of out patient therapy this year, the PT said almost every time, don't over think this. But, after working with Taylor these past months, the overthinking came in out patient therapy because it didn't feel like all the information and the cause and effects hadn't been explained...it was just...do this...it's from the book of PT...it's what everybody does...but the lack of background info triggered the overthinking on my part. So maybe this season...see I didn't forget the beginning of this long paragraph...is one of eradicating overthinking...refining responses...walking in love and kindness...and yes, not fitting or adjusting to any box kind of living.
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