Mom, I Need Some Help With My Hair

Today was a hard day but it was a peace-filled day.  We went to see my mom in her latest residence.  After seeing her today, this will probably be her last earthly residence.  Her next home, heaven.  I was prepared knowing she would not be lively or vibrant as she was last weekend.  She was asleep when we arrived and she never woke up. Her breathing labored and shallow.   I sat beside her bed and told her how much I love her, what a wonderful mother she is.  I thanked her for all the laughter and fun she brought to life.  I thanked her for all the sacrifices she had made for my brother and me.  I apologized for being disobedient, you know just sometimes, and I thanked her for raising us to love Jesus.  I leaned over and kissed her on her cheek and jaw.  Both times, she made a little pucker and kissy noise but never awakening.  Somewhere in the back of my mind, I thought maybe my kiss would have the same effect on her as Prince Charmings had on Snow White or whatever Disney princess that gets awakened by a kiss.  I stood there a long time looking and taking in my mother's features.  She has always been a thin woman but she has lost 14 pounds in the last week.  My mother would not be happy knowing that she has gone several years without a body wave in her hair.  When I was a kid, my mom went every week to the Flair Beauty Salon.  She got blonder from time to time and she always had a good wash, set and tease to her hair.  She slept in a thing called a magic turban to keep her hair in place until the next appointment which was always on a Friday.  She even slept on a silk pillow case to keep that beautiful unnatural look that all the women wore.  I used to be bothered that when I grew up I would have to give up time to go to the beauty shop and get my hair done.  Ah, thank goodness for the late 60's and 70's when a weekly trip to get a bea-fon-te wasn't required.  She really tried to instill in me the love of a good permanent.  I got the Tony permanent at home and a few salon ones in my day.  Every Saturday night my mom would roll my hair on spoolies and later on pink hair curlers.  A few times we even tried those curlers that had brushes in them and they hurt.  She would roll my hair and then wrap a scarf around the curlers and in the morning I should have perfectly curled hair for church.  Only thing, I have never been one that can sleep very still.  By morning the scarf was flung on the floor and we would hunt for those curlers soon after awakening.  My early hair years were just sad, but my mom never gave up on me and good hair. 

My mother loves the sun, sitting by a pool getting a tan or a trip to the beach.  She hated and feared getting near the water.  One summer we had a pool membership to a place called Hawaiian Village.  My brother and I loved the fact there was a snack bar right there by the pool because the city pools didn't let you have any food or drink near their pools.  I believe I was in the second or third grade the summer we had that pool membership.  My mom would sit there on the edge of the pool and tell me to be careful because she couldn't swim.  There were life guards.  That is the summer I taught myself to swim because you had to know how to swim to be able to go down the slide.  Most days mom packed our lunches but we always got to have an ice cream bar or Popsicle from the snack bar before leaving for home.  I think my mom loved that pool membership because she would take us to the pool in the mornings and by early afternoon we were beat and would take a nap when we got home.  Let's just say that my brother and I were like most other siblings and could find any reason to fuss and fight with one another.  When I was in high school my mom joined the YWCA and took a beginning swimming class.  She didn't finish the class because they were using empty coffee cans to keep them above water and I don't believe my mother believed that two coffee cans would keep her afloat enough to learn how to swim.  I loved that about my mom because she was always sympathetic when I began some class and wanted to quit after just a few times.  She would let you quit, my dad would make you go in order to build character into us.

I really don't know if I can decorate for Christmas this year.  It might be too difficult.  Most of the ornaments we have, my mom made or she would always pick out ornaments when she and my dad would go on trips.  We found the ornaments in our Christmas stockings that she had made for us when we were kids long into adulthood.  Up until several years ago, she always made peanut butter cookies for my brother and gingerbread men for me.  Even after being diagnosed with Alzheimer's she'd bake Christmas cookies for us but my gingerbread men became ginger snaps because she could no longer remember how to use a cookie cutter.  I have one of the last gingerbread cookies she ever made for me.  She did a self portrait. 

Another thing my mom tried to really get me interested in was sewing.  Never had the patience for it.  She made my Barbie some beautiful outfits and she made me some beautiful outfits as well.  Being tall in a non tall world, her sewing made slacks and pants for me so I didn't have to wear high waters.  While packing things up this summer I put away some pillows and other fun things she had made for me through the years. 

I'm sure I will have a few more blog posts about her.  I want to remember the real and raw emotions during this time.  Just for fun tomorrow I might just spray some hairspray on my hair, really nice and thick.  Never learned how to tease me hair, so maybe I can just dry my hair upside down and then spray it.  Yep, my mom would get a good laugh out of that and then she would try to smooth it down so at least I would be presentable.