Saturday, October 8, 2011

Wanderings and Thoughts

This could be a good or bad thing, but Roy just left with a list and he's on his way to HEB via the cleaners and Lowe's.  He does great with a list but he loves to free lance and he brings home all kinds of surprises.  Unloading sacks today will prove quite interesting,  Roy has gone to the store because physically I am having a really bad week.  It has been a while since I have felt this bad.  My heart keeps going out of rhythm and when that happens my energy is totally zapped.  It hit me hard on Wednesday and today is the first day I've have felt like doing anything.  Only because the maid came on Thursday did I go to Bible study.  They gave the treasurer's report at the beginning of the lecture time.  I was asking God why did He hate me?  It was tough to endure that.  I was going to go straight home afterwards but Peggy and Kathleen persuaded me to go with them to Lupe's.  I only drank ice tea.  Didn't even eat a chip or salsa.  That is a very revealing look into how I am feeling.  Never, well hardly ever, pass up some good chips and salsa.  I came home and dropped into bed.  Friday wasn't much better.  That brings us to today.  We got up early and went out for breakfast and then picked up a couple of things at Target.  Didn't have it in me for the trifectta, HEB.  The oxygen levels in my blood are down a little.  It has been almost a year since my Chaka Khan procedure and I had forgotten how bad I feel when the ticker is racing and working too hard. 

On Thursday night I moved into the guest room to sleep.  I was restless and had a fever.  I learned a lot about Buddy's nocturnal wanderings.  She was all over the washer and dryer.  She rested for a bit in the mud room area of the laundry room.  I have never once seen her be interested in anything in the laundry room during the day, well other than her litter box.  I think she has to touch everything so it becomes hers.  She was not one bit happy that I had taken over the bed in the guest room.  She has claimed it as her very own.  I have to say, that guest room bed is one very comfortable rest. 

Since I have been resting and sleeping a lot, I have learned quite a few things from the  TV noise in the background.  The TV is rarely on during the day when I'm at home.  For a bit of time there I became like a loved one who frets over non existent health issues...a lot.  They have been in remission for over 10 years from cancer but yet every time they have a hangnail, flu, ear wax...anything on a much smaller scale, they jump to the conclusion, "my cancer's back."  Don't get me wrong, we are sympathetic but after several fiascoes, dramatics, and the like, when they announce "my cancer's back," we react pretty have to remain somewhat indifferent cause we used to jump right in to help and soon we found ourselves overwhelmed with unnecessary drama and some senior adult hi-jinks.  So all these commercials for treatment centers, medicine and the like are rotated non stop on the commercial circuit.  In a span of 48 hours I began to believe, yep, I have lymphoma.  No, no make that pancreatic cancer.  It could be the heartbreak of phriesis.  I need lunestra.  I be needing all the medicines they advertise on TV.  Finally, common sense got a hold of me, shook some sense back into me and then reminded me...do you know you are sounding like your loved one?  That got my attention. 

That's it for today.  Happy footbal weekend!  Rooting for LSU today and the Texans tomorrow. 

1 comment:

courtney said...

Mon. Lunestra?? That's only for insomniacs like me! Praying for your health tonight.