Blogging/Venting=Just Plain Old Complaining in a Teckie Way

I tried to blog last night and the mouse wouldn't work correctly. It was probably good that I could not write. To be honest, I was in the worst mood last night. A really bad mood and to me the catharsis would be to vent. VENT loud! Of course I can see that God had a hand in the mouse and other parts of our computer not working correctly. I hate to admit it though, I was getting in a worse mood over the whole situation. Well it was God or the Norton update we did on Tuesday which always messes things up for a few days.About the time I had given up writing anything, Roy came home after a long day at the office. He sat down and said, tell me all about it. He didn't know the build up of frustrations, the miserable hole I feel in the core of my being and minor hurts and issues that felt like such a slight. He got to hear it all, the stuff I am tired of, the weariness in not growing weary in doing good, the lack of encouragement I feel, the dying of a dream and here is the clincher...this will just show you how petty I have been feeling....Are you ready? Will you still like me after I admit this? Gosh, I hope so. This has been the most chocolate birthday ever and I don't really care for chocolate that much. I will be bringing chocolate to the office and giving it away in the coming days. See, I told you I had sunk pretty far into the whole self pity kind of thing.I am glad that I didn't blog all that was on my mind last night. I will be honest even more so, I didn't wake up in all that great of mood. But God...He is faithful and He spoke to me this morning as I began half heartidly with my quiet time. I began to pour out my heart to Him, all the hurts, the issues, and the feeling of exile. I agree with Him, He is in control, He knows the plans, He knows my heart, and He knows what I need. Buddy and I seem to have a lot in common these days, she sits at the front door and cries...she wants hallway adventure until a noise or a person scares her and she runs into the comfort of home. I too am sitting at the door of life, crying for "hallway adventure" and just like Buddy, the first noise or strange person that comes my way, is going to make me run into the safety and comfort of home. God knows and God cares. He knows the timing and what is best. He knows my talents and gifts He has given me and He knows how they are used. *He has encouragment coming but I hope He doesn't give me chocolate.Today was Brand Camp for the staff at church. We saw the new logo and got freebies. Love getting a goodie bag. The rest of the day is thought provoking. Thanks for listening, thanks for reading.* By saying this I am in no way looking for people to comment with encouragment etc...God knows the source of my despair and the encouragment I need.