I Love My Mom

It's spring so I just changed out purses. Well, I had actually sized down to my travel purse for a couple of weeks, but feel the need to gear up for carrying about the big purse. So out of the brown Michael Kors and into the blue Donney and Burke. I dread changing out the accumulated junk in a purse. There are receipts, deposit slips, little notes to myself, ragged pieces of paper from something long gone and lastly all the junk that filters through to the bottom. You know pennies, tops of pens, lost mints and the like. Gunk! So now I can boldly go into the spring season.

This has been perfect convertible weather. I'm hoping that Roy gets home from the office soon in order to make a little drive about. Yesterday, after working out, I sat at some tables outside the club and finished up a couple of chapters from the book I am reading on the bike now, The Last Gentleman by Walker Pearcy. I like The Moviegoer but I am enjoying this story much more. Seems the themes of these two books have been the main character trying to stay out of the mundane of the everyday and find wonder and meaning in the daily. I've read some great quotes only I have to find them again because I don't have a pen with me on the bike.

Roy, the hero, stepped in again today to take care of details for the beginning of next week. My dad called this morning to let us know their home phone was working again. We visited a little and I asked him if he had returned Roy's phone calls yet that he had left on their cell phone. My dad responded, what does he want to talk about? So clearly, Dad is a bit on the run in pleasing Roy and getting his assignments taken care of. My father is a tale bearer and will lie when the situation needs to go his way. We've caught him in some of his "stories" and our desire is to deal with him honestly and directly with love. Chaos develops and drama is the order of the day because my dad is doing his best to keep everyone off balance in order to control. He hasn't dealt with steady Roy before and his schemes are not working. Yahoo!!! It does take something out of me to deal with my dad. I want to be kind but I have to be vigilant for the duplicity that is always involved. Everything within me wants to take a nap to recover from the conversation and I am resisting because I want to get out and enjoy this beautiful day. After I got off the phone I felt the anxiety attack begin but today I resisted it and did not give in to fear. I know the next two weeks will be difficult but I am not looking to whine or complain, OK, I want to...but I also know that Eph says having done everything to stand, stand therefore. I am putting myself into God's strength and standing on His Word. I am looking for the wonder and delight in the day. I am looking for His presence in the daily so that I might be like Moses and go inspect the burning bush and hear a word from the Lord.

I got a call this week that Mrs. Baker died and her funeral is on Monday at St. Martin's. Beth, her niece and my friend, called to let me know. Mrs. Baker would have been 92 on April 1. She is in heaven with Mr. Baker and more importantly with Jesus. Beth and I got caught up a little and she has invited me to go play golf with her at the country club once my parent's health issues settle. Of course panic set in, I have nothing golf-ish to wear to Houston Country Club... I'll cross that bridge when I get to it. I'd rather just drive the golf cart for her. Now I know what to wear to do that.

My mom just called a little confused on details. She is actually double checking what my dad wrote on the calendar. She's worried but we talked about the faithfulness of God and we talked about how He has taken such good care with us through the years. Just talking about the Lord calmed her and we were able to laugh as we recited the schedule of the next week several times. What seems to be an inconvient shadow right now can turn to full on sunny when looking for the wonder and joy. It's different with my mom, no agenda and no lies. She needs to be reassured. At the end of the call she said, well I have to go outside and apologize to God for not trusting Him and to your dad because I didn't believe him. Smart woman. I love my mom.