If you have read Monablog for anytime you know that once winter like temperatures and overcast days roll around, I'm humming and quoting the song, In the Bleak Mid Winter...you know one of the happiest and joyful songs of all Christmas. Half the time I am not singing the real words but words that M&G wrote to it years ago. It's a mixed bag. I have to have the words of What Child Is This in front of me because I sing our version of Whose Child Is This. I have forgotten the real words.
Roy just came home from Bible study and he is getting ready to head back out to take some things to KCM, remember that is Katy Christian Ministries, not Ken Copeland Ministries. Don't think he or his ministry is in need of gently worn clothes. Then he is making a stop at Midway Market for bacon. It's that time of year when the world falls in love and it could be falling in love with bacon over at our home. We rarely eat it but cold temps and holidays just says, eat some bacon. The magazines that we subscribe to also send mixed messages. There is Southern Living, Southern Lady and Garden and Gun espousing cakes, cookies, sugar, fat, adult beverages and the like....then there are the few fitness magazines we take that espouse the danger of the holiday season of cakes, cookies, sugar, fat, adult beverages and the like... It is a good thing I have ADD and can't pay attention long enough to feel guilty or prideful about all this.
It is feeling like a Mexican food type of day. We have to narrow the choices because there are a million places to chose from out here in Rancho De Five. In the world of food news, Roy saw that a Wendy's is open on 1463. They have some of the best salads in all of fast food land. Next to it a Southern Maid Donut shop is opening on Monday. The Luby's/Fudrucker's is getting closer and closer to completion. Yes, I have finally joined in with the senior adults being happy about a Luby's opening and not some other trendy type of place. Don't get me wrong, I am happy about Katy getting a Trader Joe's next year but not as happy as veggies already prepared and waiting for you to make your choice or going with a senior discount on the Luanne Platter.
The fireplace has been on since early this morning. When you have gas logs I don't think you can refer to it as a roaring fire. It's gently controlled. Soon the quiet will turn and our home will be alive with the sounds of LSU football and then later in the evening Baylor football. Geaux and Sic Em!
While reorganizing last night I came across my heart journal that I kept at the beginning of that journey. It was fun reading for me because of all the healing that has happened, how each and every twist and turn was met with hope and faith. The prayers that were being lifted up in my behalf and the kindness of friends and strangers always warms my heart and for these things I am so grateful. That in the midst of an extraordinary illness, God made it possible for me to live it out as ordinary. In the journal were some notes I had taken from an online group I joined after I retired due to my heart. I wanted to make sure my spiritual heart was healing too because working at a church can sometimes be difficult and can cause a crisis of faith, not in God but in the intentions of people. It's not all prayers and shares. The group was good for me even though I think in some aspects I am still dealing with issues and happenings that I didn't understand then, and when I see it now, I still don't understand but rejoice I'm not in the midst of it all. One of the women in the group said something that I had heard years ago, and she too talked in depth of loosing and losing yourself in getting away from toxic people and the grip we can sometimes find ourselves in. The sad fact is, if we want to get well (John 5) we have to remove ourselves from those people who have had influence on us and who never want us to get well. Heck, they don't want anyone to get well, they just want to be the benevolent voice that keeps everyone indebted to them. I remember this woman who was sharing about her situation and with the toxic co-workers and thus co-laborers she had been thrust into and at the end she knew she had to get away. Slowly but surely she felt all her talents and gifts were being undermined and she saw this chipping away at her marriage and her relationship with her children. She was healing in this online group and had found a job that valued what she brought and for her the best was, she wouldn't be working for a church or even a non-profit. I loved the time I met with this online group because we talked or rather typed out frustrations and hurts. To a woman, each and every one of us experienced significant healing, resulting in not spending a lot of time in bitter and revenge land. It is good to give thanks unto the Lord and it's good to interact and have closure with those who know how those subtle directives that infuse themselves in the midst of serving can take a toll.
It is now the evening of this cold and overcast Saturday. Roy and I had Tony's Mexican food for lunch and stopped by Pier One to buy an ottoman I have had my eyes on. We cheered LSU and now we plan to cheer on Baylor, although I am more nervous for the Baylor game than I was for the LSU game. The fireplace is lit again and Buddy is asleep in my lap. Warmed up with a cup of Christmas cinnamon tea. I need to look for my sweaters. I have no idea where I stored them. It could be a layer upon layer kind of day tomorrow.