It's a beautiful Friday morning. Abel and crew came yesterday and the yard is looking beautiful. Paying an extra $5.00 for trimming and weeding is the best deal yet. Our spirits are willing but our knees are weak. I think this cements doing the flowerbed like we did several years ago. Gorgeous flowers and Abel and crew the warrior of weeds.
Sometimes I doubt God's timing and I know I shouldn't because His ways higher/better/stronger/right. Going to the doctor yesterday was way better than on Wednesday. I was in a better mood and my blood pressure wasn't as high. To apologize for my snippiness on Wednesday I brought the front office red velvet with chocolate chunk pound cake from The Fresh Market. The visit brought good news I weighed less than last year. I really thought I would weigh more because of the comfort food eating I've been partaking during these weeks of crisis and unknown. My blood work was stellar. I had kind of got on this Hello Kitty favorite jelly beans kick and yes, I am 59 years old. I cannot help it that Hello Kitty and I like cherry, strawberry and other red and pink flavors of jelly beans. But the beans didn't put me over. PTL! But the doctor also told me I can control comfort food eating. Yes of course, but I was on a roll with good tidings of great health that I thought I would give the excuse a shot. Dang, shot down. Thankfully I didn't have to throw myself or anyone else under the bus.
If you have been a regular reader of Monablog, you know that two years ago on March 27 I received a call from the nurse at my dad's cardiologist office. She was worried because he had not made it in for his appointment. That afternoon I searched for him either in his house or his route to the doctor. The nurse told me to leave a note for him in his house and as I was writing that note and looking through his address book for phone numbers, my father returned home. From that point forward he believes I was in his office and up to no good. He talked himself into believing that we had stolen money and stocks from him. I come from a long line of conspiracy theorists and he took info and incidents that had nothing to do with one another and came up with a dosie of a story. He had his lawyer serve us with papers severing our relationship in April of 2012. During these two years we have heard wild stories of my father claiming we drive up and down his street with a bullhorn harassing him. We come inside his home, we don't have keys or the alarm code and I have NO interest in going there, moving brooms, garbage cans and leaving water on. In these months he has consistently changed the amount of money and or stocks we have taken from him. The consistent number is zero, nada, zip, nothing! There were accusations of tracking him on his cell phone, so we cut him off our bill because we weren't doing that. There are other oddities that I could write and it would be so funny if it wasn't all so sad. Several weeks ago I was told we had been turned in to Adult Protective Services and a police report had been filed by my father. Waiting for those phone calls has been like having a sword of Damocles hanging over our heads. We got the call from APS on Tuesday afternoon. I was informed of the investigation and I answered questions. I also volunteered to send in emails from my father's former attorney and my brother that would further prove our innocence and our lack of ill will. On a side note, at the time when the attorney sent emails that crossed the boundaries since she isn't a licensed therapist, I was not happy with her. But now, God's timing....it was good to have those emails that told the story and she filled in truthful details and explained his reasoning in the lies he tells. After I got off the phone, I went into my quiet zone. Most of this junk doesn't affect me anymore but this hurt because he stepped out once again, last time via the courts and this time the State of Texas. It rushes in over you the lies he has told you and the lies he willingly tells others about you. There is the blatant reminder that he has not loved you since you turned five years old. But going over the past doesn't do any good, only looking to God and His plans and future for me is my help and salvation. Yet, even trusting in God and reading His Word for strength, the lies hurt. The case worker assured me that the investigation would be timely and only drawn out if there was any malfeasance, a word I learned from the Andy Griffith Show when I was a kid. She told me to call her Wednesday afternoon and she would know something then. So the non doctor appointment on Wednesday turned into time of going to The Fresh Market and Hobby Lobby. Yes, you read that right, Hobby Lobby. I was in my quiet zone. I called her when I got home and not all of the subpoenaed files had come in. More waiting.
Yesterday, as I was about to head out the door for my appointment, the phone rang. It was the caseworker. The case was being closed. She needed to get a statement from Roy and she was contacting his doctor to get a letter in the file that he is experiencing dementia. I asked if we got a letter clearing our names? No, you only get a letter if you are under suspicion. Nope, don't need no letter. I only asked this in the case of him doing this again and she assured me investigation again would be rare. I have been serious and forthright talking with her but as we were saying goodbye I told her she had been pleasant to deal with but I hoped I never talked to her again. I thanked and praised God the moment I got off the phone! There was never a doubt that our innocence would be questioned and found guilty but you think about the things he could screw up.
If you are dealing with a loved one who is difficult one thing that will help you is this, what is their treasure? If you can find that out, you'll be able to think clearly and not emotionally in dealing with them. My father's treasure is money and the accumulation of it. Your worth to him is determined in dollars and cents. I have more thoughts on this but will write about those later.
Thank you to those who private messaged and emailed me. Your words, so encouraging to this one who was trying not to grow weary in doing good. And for those who also included appreciation of telling my story, sharing the difficulties as well as the foundation of God that gets me through times like these, thank you for letting me know this story is helping you in your own situation with a loved one. I have thoughts on this as well that I will write.
OK, love God's sense of humor, here I sit writing this out when the phone rings and once again it is from the State of Texas....which is APS. Whew, to close out the case they just needed our birthdays. Maybe they are going to send us a card or nice gifts. No, the best gift from them came yesterday, CASE CLOSED!