It was one of those things I just had to do. I've been thinking about this since last fall. In fact with the time to contemplate I had several plans in mind but finally settled on the one I would fully be able to do. I rearranged the living room yesterday. Some have already suggested that I need a job or I have been alone too much to even begin to think about this. But I reminded my friends, I have been thinking on this for quite some time and didn't have the strength to carry out any of my hard thought plans. As it turned out, I just moved a few things and didn't do the massive overhaul. It is probably a good thing because last night, in the middle of the night, my body was reprimanding me for all the punishment I put it through earlier in the day. At one point I was getting kind of worried and thought I should wake up Roy to let him know. The man would not wake up! He turned on his side and mumbled something and went right back to his peaceful snoring. Note to self: never have an emergency in the middle of the night. All is back to normal this morning and I have just a few odds and ends to put up or decide if I am going to hang pictures or not.
The quilt and pillow shams I ordered came yesterday. What I ordered is just a stop gap until I find how I really want to re-do our bedroom. The colors in the quilt match the colors we are already using. The quilt we had as our bed cover has had it. In this stop gap time I ordered a slip cover to go over my comfortable big blue chair. I want to have it reupholstered but won't until I make my decision on the re-do. Knowing me I'll be happy with this for a while. I don't like to get caught up in the trap of redecorating every few years. Our home style is mission/arts and craftsman style which is considered a traditional style and I don't have to deviate from it too much. For some reason this style reminds me of my Grandma Brownlow and it makes me feel very close to her. We have also been on a declutter cycle around here. Roy is finally catching on that means getting rid of stuff, not just moving it to another room. Roy is taking clothes to the Mission Training Center this morning and a bunch of blankets and sheets to a homeless shelter.
So I have been home one week and feel like I have made major progress yet there is still much more to work on. All this cleaning and sorting goes hand in hand to paying attention. I get so used to how things are, but sometimes it is good to go through your home with fresh eyes, as a guest, and see how things really look. Now I have to admit, my sense of style and living is not clean and minimal, well clean as in cleanliness, not as clean lines. I love being surrounded by books and mementos, but it can become overwhelming if I don't cull and go through things. I am feeling this way about my walk with God too. What can I pay attention to and do away with? Am I presenting myself as a living sacrifice, wholly acceptable to God? Are my times with Him more than just "feel good" times for me? Are my times with Him pouring out of my life in the small, mundane, and everyday extraordinaries? My desire is to be more attentive to God and the invitations He extends to me to come have the time of my life with Him as I grocery shop, eat out, cook, clean, and shop at the Nord. Moreover, if I look at these activities as times in my life and submit myself to the thought pattern of drudgery, well except for the Nord, I will totally miss what He has planned. Nord is joy! Also, I don't want to get settled in my stop gaps in walking with the Lord. All this cleaning, sorting and rearranging is great, it needs to be done. The trouble comes if I keep on with these stop gap tasks and don't move on to the reason I am cleaning, sorting and rearranging, which is having our home conducive and not distracting to study different subjects in the Bible that God has placed on my heart. Does this ring a bell with y'all too, we have some big thing we have to do, say you are having a Bible study in your home. Instead of cleaning up the living room, bathrooms and kitchen where most people will be, you get involved in the big project of cleaning out the garage and give to much time to that task. Then we hurriedly do what really needed to be taken care of in a sloppy way, complaining we never have enough time. We tend to put off what really needs our attention. This is where I find myself thinking this morning. Kind of like blogging right now instead of getting cleaned up and dressed for the day.
The verse that has come to my attention in the past several days through different books I am reading is this:
"in returning and rest is your salvation; in quietness and trust is your strength." Isaiah 30:15
This verse has been my meditation during the last week, yes some thoughts have come while I sit and reflect, but most have come while doing the work and knowing God is right there, speaking to me and showing me there is joy.
Thanks for letting me reflect and thanks for reading this really long post.
3 comments:
and thanks for posting such a "longpost" ..it is my pleasure to be able to read it....re: your verse Is 30:15.... there is much to meditate on...just the tension (to use a joseph ratzinger word) between rest v.s. Salvation and between quiet, trust v.s. Strength gives my poor mind enough dichotomies to wrapitselfaround!!!!! Again, it
was my pleasure...keep posting!
I love reading your posts and the insights God gives you. They are really encouraging to me.
When you do your redo you need to visit the store that my husband works for. It is The Amish Craftsman and is on Washington at TC Jester. From how you describe your house I think you would love the stuff they sell!
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