Friday, June 29, 2007

Checking in with the Staff, Part Two

OK, I am going to try this again. I wrote in a post last month about my last trip to SPA Nordstrom. A Little Trip to the Nord Changes It All and how Stacy told me to free up my lower back, she needed to work on my glutes. So, all month I have been preparing myself for this. Now, to understand why I had to gut it up so to speak is this, I have irrational fears. It has been this way since I was a kid. So, before I can go onwards with my story of the SPA Nord Night, I have to let you know about these fears and the deliverance therein.

I have irrational fears and have had them since I was little. I use the letters IF in my journal for irrational fear. Last year I led a staff devotion on John 11. There are a lot of ifs in that chapter. The disciples have ifs, the crowd has ifs, Martha had an if and even her holy and saintly sister Mary who always is found at Jesus' feet had an if. But Jesus had a bigger If to theirs. His is, if you believe. They were iffing on if you had been here, if he is asleep that is good, and if He is the Son of God. Jesus' If has to be bigger than our what ifs or ifs...we have to put our ifs into His capable and strong will for our lives. So the question is, whose if is bigger in our lives?

So, IF...irrational fear came early on in my life. When I was 2 and 3 my dad would take me on snow walks in the winter. No, not in Houston, but we lived in the burbs of Chicago. We would walk around the school across the street from our home and he would make noises like someone is trapped in the school. I wanted to help the person and the story always was the janitor was locked in and if we helped him he would hurt us. Yea, that makes sense, but I believed it. So, I began to have the irrational fear of being locked in and of schools. Couple this with my grandmother reciting Little Orphan Annie to me at night with the phrase, "and the goblins are gonna git you if you don't watch out" and I was a feared little girl. When my brother came along and we would get into arguments and fights, our parents would fake pack and leave us at home thinking that would stop us from fighting. In fact, my dad kept the phone number of an orphanage by the phone to call if we could not behave and the orphanage could come and pick us up. So with these kind of things and some much worse, my brother and I have had life long issues with being left. So as adults any outing or event, I would always volunteer to drive, that way I could not be left. When I didn't drive and had no control, I would carry around hundreds of dollars just in case I needed to get home. Thankfully the Lord and therapy has delivered me from that irrational fear.

Most children think there are monsters under their beds, I thought my monster was Mary Todd Lincoln. We were in Springfield, IL at a museum and I said to my mom, "Mary Todd Lincoln is fat." I also found out on the tour she was crazy. My mom told me not to speak ill of the dead. In my head two and two meant crazy Mary Todd Lincoln was under my bed at night. If my arm or leg slipped off the edge of the bed, she was waiting there to sweep me under. I know that Mary does not live under our bed now. There is too much junk underneath it for her to be there, (see Mary Todd Lincoln is fat) and Buddy goes under our bed all the time and she comes out alive. :) Forgive me Lisa, but I had to put a smiley face there.

Here is the one irrational fear I have not let go of, mammograms during bad weather and storms. When I was 35 I went to have a baseline mammogram and I heard some of the tecs teasing each other. They said, what if the electricity went out or there was a fire, guess we would have to run and leave these ladies hooked up to the machine. So out of their teasing I developed this irrational fear of having a mammogram during bad weather. Just this month, can I tell you how many times I have canceled appointments? I mean really if you think about it, when your "girls" are smushed in the machine and electricity gone, how do they get you out and if there was a fire, you know "every woman for herself "is going to take over rational minds. I told the nurse the other day I would make an appointment in a season of less volatile weather.

So, how does irrational fear play a part in the SPA story? In my irrational fear mind, one should never be naked in a store. Even when you are trying on a swimsuit, you still wear underwear. At any other SPA, this thought doesn't even cross my mind, cause this is what you do at a SPA, but when the SPA is in the store...I have struggled. If there was a fire would I have the presence of mind to stop by the locker and get all my clothes. I would be standing there in a robe and in my irrational thinking, I would feel better if I had on some panties with the robe. Here is another thing that just gets me. In the relaxation room where everyone is sitting there in a robe, I have had conversations with men who are complete strangers, but I had the protection of undies on. As I was relaxing yesterday, the new massage therapist, who is a man, was there with his client. I was a little more nervous...no undie protection. I am glad that most of the time it is all ladies. When a man is there in the middle of the day, I want to say, go to your JOB! Yesterday, while I got ready for my appointment, I paid attention to detail...you know this would be a "first" and I wanted to look good not have an embarrassing moment. Kind of reminded me of how we get ready for first dates, but to use that example you might get the wrong impression of my single life. No, I am just saying, after things become old hat, you don't give the detailed attention... I am going to move on, so, I did it. At one point my irrational fear told me I was being paged in the store. In addition to the new sans experience, I had also arranged for an hour and half massage. I had 40.00 in Nord Notes and being a good steward of money and a cheerful giver, I used the notes for an extra special treat. After the massage was over Stacy said, "it will be hard for you to go back on both accounts...sans panties and back to an hour massage. She was right. As a side note, when you get a massage you should always ask if they will massage your head and ears. That ear massage will make one go all Peggy Hill, "Oh Yea!"


So, last night I decided to do a little visitation to the congregation there at The Nord. Since I am now The Reverend Nancy of the Nord, to do so is the call on my life. Yesterday, I stayed home from work because of the trip/fall in my last post, a groggy fever kind of headache and a sore throat. I knew my visit to the SPA would work wonders on my body and my spirit. Stacy even used essential oil on my back for my congestion. She told me I would sleep well and deep. She was right, best night sleep in a long time, but it could also have been from all the carbs in the Greek Pizza and orange chicken lettuce wraps I had at CPK afterwards. I met Dena for din din.

I left refreshed and encouraged. I was anointed with fresh oil (Psalm 92:10b) and I am planted in the house of the Nord flourishing...Psalm 92:13.

Several have asked about membership in First Nording... it is easy, when you hear the piano playing -come... I'll be there to welcome you. Some have asked if they can serve as a deacon or deaconess...yes!!! But, I guess I should have some guidelines...guess it would be Love the Nord. If you have never been to the Nord, it is not too late to go.

I will be at the House of the Nord tomorrow. I would have gone today for lunch, but I had been there on Sunday, Wednesday and last night. I need to pace myself.

2 comments:

Amanda said...

You are hilarious. I loved the bit about how to join. And I have you to thank for my overwhelming desire to have a massage now!

Laurie said...

Reverend Nancy,
I think I need to you to disciple me. Not only have I never been to The Nord, but I also have never had a massage. The massage thing happens to stem from an Irrational Fear. Is there help for me?